August 25, 2013

Competent Comforting 2 - Presence

Just being there.

Probably the most important thing we can do for our friends.

"For where two or three have gathered together in My name, I am there in their midst."


Sometimes, we may need to do nothing more than this.




But here is where the need to understand our own emotions and reactions comes into play.

We hold our friend, weep with them, pray for comfort with them. But we have to make sure the focus stays on them.

Wisdom, theology, and theodicy don't need to be spoken at this time.

"I'm so sorry."

"I love you."

"I don't understand, either."

"What can I do to help you right now?"

Look them in the eyes.

Leave all your own obligations and worries out in the car.

Be there. Right there, right then.

In these raw and tender times, the feeling of the presence of Christ can be more palpable than most times.

If you notice your own feelings trying to draw your attention away from your friend, make sure to talk with someone about it afterwards. Remind yourself why you are there.

Grief is unique to every person. Let them grieve in their own way, in their own time.

When the initial shock has subsided, they'll let you now when they're ready to talk.


Know in your heart that by loving your friend, you're loving yourself and God at the same time.




Part 1
Part 3

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